I haven't written in awhile. Like Winter that has lingered longer than desired, I have been slow to bubble up out of my creative cave. Even as Winter lingered, so did the Dark Night of the Soul. "Dark" not to be judged as good or bad, just dark, cavelike, deep within crevices that are not exposed to light. I felt like a fungus in a rainforest that needs so little light to grow.

 

I experienced both the extreme highs of motivation, as well as the lows, in my wallowing and searching, and a lot of places in between. Sometimes my skills have been lacking when it came to rising out of the muck, and despair so palpable only my dog's eyes held me in this physical world. 

 

This process of re-birthing this year feels so much more challenging than prior years. I found so many things in my mundane life that didn't work to reward me or those I love and care about. It sometimes felt futile to keep existing if my belly rumblings will not flower in bright colors and grace my outer world with ease and beauty. 

 

And then, I remember the glimmerings I witnessed in imagination and the wealth of love and friendship that surrounds me. In that moment, the outer world becomes a kaliedoscope of greens, oranges, reds, blues and yellows! Spring displays herself in all her wonderful wildness, bursting open widely, generously. The Dark is the shadow cast by such brightness. A necessary shadow for fungus to grow. When perspective shifts, with the help of imagination, a world is given the hope of balance.  

 

Staying in the "muck" awhile longer this year may also provide magnificent colors I have yet to experience. An uncomfortably long cycle is an opportunity to become a mouse or an owl, to inspect the details closer, with sharp sight and a keen nose. To burrow a little deeper, maybe, to eventually unearth what needs light to grow. 

 

As I play with and sort through my seed packets spread across my table, I wonder what will bear fruit (or vegetable!) this year. What do I plan to nurture toward harvest? What will I imagine into being? The possibilities are limitless and becoming clearer after having spent a longer time gestating this year.

 

I wish for you ease and discernment. Where will your energies go toward bearing the fruit that will sustain you through another Winter?

 

 

 

 




Oh Women!

My Loves My Lives!

In the full void of our wombs

We look within to speak out.

No more another's voice for us

But to be our own voice

to speak as I Am.

No more the squeaky voice

of opression, betrayal, shame.

 

With ease the Voice of fierceness

and power

Waking the unsaid,

Exercising a sound not yet heard

Deep out from the emptiness

that is not empty.

Bring out not sudden

But let us unfold together 

as a garden in spring

according to the Law that is All.

It is no mistake that opening

begins in Winter

as carpets soften the ground

and protect the warmth

that brews.

As our hearts our souls

Our Voice

Brews.

Gathering the seeds

Carefully.

With discernment.

Fiercely alive.

 

Blessed be All.

Amen.

Ho.

 



©2018





still life

 

 



charcoal drawing

 

 



adding color

 



reversing and adding more color

 

 


 

The new season has been quiet. Time for meditation, contemplation and............exploration! I've been playing with media I haven't used in a long time like charcoal, brush pen, colored pencils and oil pastel. It's been freeing to just explore and not think about "finished work". I'm calling it "getting down to the bones"!

 

Here's a series of photos following the progress of a charcoal pencil drawing from a still life. I love smooshing the charcoal around, using pressure to create shade or color and wiping and blending!

 


 

 

 

 

 

 




 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

 

 






What bones are you creating?

Happy new year.......

 

 



"Zorra" watercolor©2000

 

Winter Solstice is my favorite holiday. It represents a time of inner watching for me. A time of low activity and conjuring dreams within my heart, my mind, my soul. A time I spend walking in the muck of my darkest places and seeking guides to shed light on the places I need guidance. A time of self reflection, reassessment, realignment. I look forward to the lengthening days, when I can spend more time in the woods before dusk. I also look forward to the lengthening days as they uplift my heart full of possible dreams to manifest for the coming year.

 

This year I am assessing how will I act, respond, be present, take responsibility to the growing fire around me, within me. I watch and wait right now. Watch deeply for the truth within me and wait while I conjure ideas for action looking to the wisdom of those who have walked before me. I feel dramatic change afoot. I feel a stirring for different action. I call in my guardians, my friends, my guides and teachers to help me stay true to heart and assist my mind to walk a compassionate path.

 

As light slowly expands, my prayer is for united strength and action from heart. I call on Kali, Durga, Romi Kumu and Zorra to fan my heart flames to action and blaze a trail through darkness for my heart to navigate. To not be distracted and stopped by destruction and to have faith in the slow, steady burn of change.

 

May whatever you celebrate this season bring you joyously closer to your own transforming fire. 



Morning Moon, Friday, Decmber 8, 2017


As we approach Winter Solstice, the sun path lowers in the sky, the moon path rises higher. Also this month, the moon path is close to the earth and seems larger, bolder, inviting me into it's rhythms. It will be dark - a new moon - near Solstice, appropriate to the seasonal celebration of the longest night, the shortest day. 

This time of year invites me to seek inner worlds, to journey within and reflect on what intentions I will choose to rise up from my heart as the sun path begins it's journey higher in the sky. As I follow the darker, quieter invitations lit by the moon and stirred by it's rhythms, my wishes are inspired by the path I have already walked. I ready myself with my new intentions, to follow the sun path. 

Back and forth, like the rhythm of the waves, reflecting and looking forward, I let go and I reach out. 

 

This year, I wish for forgiveness, grace and consciousness of abundance. 

 

What are your wishes? What do you desire to manifest as the sun path rises?

 

Joyous Solstice!


I’ve been conjuring possibilities visually and verbally. 

That’s the name I gave this process of painting from within, painting the heart’s language, Intuitive painting.

I name it “Conjuring”.

I conjure without “naming”.

Ha! A contradiction? Not a contradiction?

 

Paint to paper without giving it a “name” as I paint. This is a process of non-judgment. By not-naming what I paint, I open a door to my own void within. The endless mystery and resource of reflection, possibility, dream, love. 

Not naming is a step. A step into unknown. Without boundaries. No limits. No judgment. There I find freedom and allow “it” to be as “it” is. 

It is a baby step and a GIANT step. It is movement, not linearly. Expansive within. Movement with love, embracing all that is and can be and has been. It’s BIG as the world and small as a newborn child. I conjure courage.

When I do not name, I leave the head and dive into the heart, the body, the soul. All the juicy places that are who I am, really, authentically. Conjuring the language that is not language. Conjuring with color, paint. Accepting the image. The color for as it is, not as it could should would be. I see from the heart. I witness. 

Then I listen.

Listen deeply.

Listen with eyes open.

Listen with eyes closed.

Listen to the rhythm.

Listen

Listen

Listen

listen without judgment

listen with discernment

 

Discerning articulates all that I see in the void of my container, of what I hold and embrace. Articulates love. 

 

Blessings and gratitude.

See you on the next round of movement……….

 





What is intuitive painting? I have read many responses to that question. "Intuitive painting is spontaneous, no thought painting. Intuitive painting is non-representational. Intuitive painting means anyone can paint like a child... "

 

I don't think there is a wrong answer because there are so many ways to express all that comes from the heart.

 

For me, intuitive painting started as soul work, healing deep wounds and scars within my heart. It continues to be soul work for me as I uncover the many layers of not only my personal wounds, but the universal historic wounds all women carry. So, intuitive painting also feels like healing a greater wound, greater than myself.

 

Intuitive painting, for me, is a thread to follow as I unravel who I am on any given day, month, year, season.

 

It is a return to child-like play, through imagination and magic. I have discovered that imagination may start in childhood and as I grow and age, imagination is my source of vision, connection to all that is, to all that may be, to all possibility beyond any boundary the mind can create.

 

Intuitive painting is FREEDOM. Freedom to explore, to create, to love, to be light, to be play. 

 

Intuitive painting is a possibility for discovery. An invitation to see beyond the superficial layers of existence and declare a path of movement. 

 

So. What is intuitive painting to you? I'd love to hear from you. Drop me a response to this musing or find me on facebook, https://www.facebook.com/transformationalimages/

 

see you in the world beyond.........