"Small Voice in the Midst of Chaos"
There has been a lot going on in our world over the past months. Disease has manifested in humans the world over. We are quarantined. We are mandated to wear masks. We are mandated to social distance and not touch or embrace. Fear is palpable. Humans believe we can beat this with these outward measures of safety. We know change is afoot. It can all be overwhelming.
I have listened to and read writings of various learned people from differing perspectives. I have spent time in silence, in the forest, listening. I paint to engage my creative self, my imagination. I call on all the tools and guides I have befriended to cope, to grow, to seek, to find the small quiet voice within. I have felt the gamut from fear to bliss. I have expressed myself with peaceful wisdom and with fiery passion; with objectivity and with judgement.
And in the end, the truth that I feel in my gut is that we are as much this world as the world is us. The words of learned thinkers, scientists, writers that make the most amount of sense to me have to do with connection. We -- everything that exists -- are in this together. Not just humans. Animals. Trees. Air. Water. Bugs. Animate and inanimate. All that exists. We are all in this together. Not to defeat, but to come together.
I dream a world that knows this connection deep within the belly and lives connection everyday.
So, where it begins is in me. Each day as I visit with the forest, I open a little more as I listen for the murmurings, the sensations that lead me on a path to fully embrace connection consciously in every fiber of my being. Even though I have always believed the truth of connection, I am a product of the cultural conditioning I have lived with since I was born into this body. The conditioning of separation. I feel as though I am going through a great "undoing". The time of separation, of descent, of initiation (and eventual birthing), has been a time of unfurling for me. I am learning to embrace the chaos of releasing and letting go of control with both feet on the earth. I am learning to embrace not knowing an outcome. And, following the lead of this virus, taking this time to purge toxins from my thoughts, my emotions, my body. And to dream.
I don't feel alone in this process of living with chaos. So many of us - humans - are reflecting, loving, fearing, making mistakes, learning, forgiving, dreaming, creating, falling, standing.....being human. I have faith we will sort it out. It may take a few tries. For the timebeing, I dream.
I dream a world of all beings living in balance and harmony, thriving in the truth of interdependence and connection.
I often return to the knowledge of indigenous people of this land, and to their prayer: Haudenosaunee Thanksgiving Address. The prayer reminds me to stay the course toward my dream. Humility and gratitude are a good place to start. The prayer begins:
"Today we have gathered and we see that the cycles of life continue. We have been given the duty to live in balance and harmony with each other and all living things. So now, we bring our minds together as one as we give greetings and thanks to each other as people. Now our minds are one."
In this time of chaos, may we all find our duty to honor all cycles of life and death, and live in balance and harmony with all that exists in this amazing universe we co-habitate. May we acknowledge our mistakes with forgiveness and make efforts to change. May we have faith in the goodness of ourselves and each other. May our minds and hearts be as one.
Read the full Thanksgiving Address: